In 2025, Constancy Investments did a research on {couples} and cash. 45% of {couples} often argue about cash. For nearly 25% (1 in 4 couples) of them, funds are literally their greatest problem
If you happen to’re relationship, engaged, or newly married, and even in a ‘critical’ talking stage, listed here are the most important cash purple flags to look out for and easy methods to repair them earlier than they wreck your fortunately ever after.
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1. The Awkward Power Round Cash Talks
You may speak about the whole lot else, however the second cash comes up, there’s an ungainly silence. You’re each “managing”, however you haven’t any concept about one another’s financial savings, money owed, or spending habits.
The Repair: Begin small. Don’t launch right into a full audit. Make it an informal chat. Ask questions like, “What’s your greatest monetary aim for us?” or “How did your dad and mom deal with cash?” This opens the door for deeper cash talks earlier than marriage with out strain.
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2. Zero Plans Past the Marriage ceremony
The aso-ebi is picked, the corridor is booked, however what concerning the monetary plan for after the images?
A wedding and not using a monetary plan, particularly for newlyweds in Nigeria, is like driving and not using a vacation spot in thoughts. You received’t get far.
The Repair: Sit down and create a First-12 months Price range. Think about lease, payments, financial savings, and even cash for sudden points.
3. The “My Cash is Mine” Mentality
The ‘My cash is my cash; his cash is our cash’ mentality is widespread today. Whereas I fairly perceive the place this mindset stems from, it may pose critical issues to a brand new marriage.
If one among you has a “boss” mentality as a substitute of a “teammate” mindset, there’s bother. Marriage is a partnership. Pondering when it comes to “my cash” and “your cash” and not using a joint plan for shared objectives creates a divide.
The Repair: Undertake an “Our Cash” method for family objectives. A sensible system is to have three accounts: “Yours”, “Mine”, and “Ours”.
The joint account covers shared bills (lease, meals, and lightweight payments), whereas private accounts enable for particular person freedom. That is key to managing funds as a pair.
4. Dwelling Past Means
All of us love the soft life, however continuously borrowing or exhibiting off on social media whereas payments pile up isn’t splendid. It’s anxious. You might study extra from the ex-Olori of Iwo’s marital woes.
When one companion loves luxurious greater than stability, it may create fixed stress.
The Answer: Practise the 50/30/20 rule. 50% of your revenue for wants, 30% for desires, and 20% for financial savings.
In case your companion insists on “residing massive”, speak about why. Typically it’s strain or insecurity, not greed. Give attention to constructing a life-style you each can afford and maintain.
READ ALSO: 7 money-saving tips for newlywed couples in 2023.
5. Secret Spending or Hidden Debt
In case your companion hides receipts, avoids cash talks, or at all times has a mysterious mortgage, that’s an enormous purple flag.
Monetary secrecy, additionally referred to as monetary infidelity, is among the prime causes {couples} struggle about cash.
The Repair: Full disclosure is non-negotiable. Earlier than you marry, lay all of your playing cards on the desk. Create a joint plan to repay the money owed collectively. Tackling it as a staff from the beginning strengthens your bond as a substitute of breaking it later.
READ ALSO: 4 Financial Tips For Married Couples From Psalm 49.
6. Refusing to Price range Collectively
When one individual handles all the cash, it may trigger imbalance and resentment. You each need to know what’s coming in and going out.
The Answer: Create a joint price range. Monitor bills collectively and agree on spending limits for enjoyable, presents, and payments. That transparency helps construct unity, not suspicion.
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7. Mismatched Cash Values
One individual might consider in saving; the opposite in spending. Or one goals of shopping for property, whereas the opposite simply desires to flex. These mismatched values can spark infinite arguments.
The purple flag is refusing to discover a center floor. Perceive one another’s “cash story”. The saver may need skilled an absence sooner or later of their lives, whereas the spender finds pleasure in giving.
The Repair: Create a price range that enables for each saving for a home and a small “enjoyable fund” for guilt-free spending. Compromise is vital.
Additionally, earlier than marriage, have an sincere “cash mindset” speak. Ask one another:
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What does monetary safety imply to you?
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Do you worth experiences or investments?
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What are your long-term cash objectives?
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