How to deal with a friend who always wants to exploit you

Sure, we perceive. Friendship should not all the time be about what you may get. There will be occasions you must give too, and fortunately so. However you need to additionally perceive the skinny line between giving in friendship and being exploited.

Every now and then, we meet that one pal who appears all the time to be taking your time, your cash, your power, whereas providing little or no in return. Such mates can simply depart you feeling drained, used, or manipulated.

In case you are on this scenario, it is time to inform your self the reality. Such friendships won’t ever profit you. However what are you able to do?

Listed below are useful steps you may comply with to deal with conditions like this, with mates, who’re keen to use you.

ALSO READ: Friendship or Toxicity: 10 obvious signs you’re in a toxic friendship

Recognise The Pink Flag

Let’s face it – not all exploitations are clear and visual. Generally, it may be laborious to note, particularly by the exploited particular person. That is why psychologists typically suggest that step one to coping with an exploiter is to recognise that you just’re being exploited within the first place. Look out for traits like:

All the time needing assist however by no means exhibiting up for you, even whenever you’re not essentially on the lookout for monetary assist

Borrowing cash and by no means paying again

Solely calling or checking up on you after they want one thing.

You are most likely being exploited in the event you ever discover your self in a give-and-take scenario.

Set Clear Boundaries 

Now that you just suspect exploitation, it is time to take motion. One of many first issues to do is to attract strains that should not be crossed. Politely however firmly say “No” when their requests really feel an excessive amount of.

You don’t owe anybody fixed entry to your time or assets, particularly when it is costing your peace or not being reciprocated. Effectively, if they are not understanding your boundaries or the necessity for them, there’s most likely no need to be friends with them within the first place.

Have the Troublesome Dialog

Avoiding it could lengthen the injury. Speak to your pal calmly and categorical how you are feeling. Decide your phrases rigorously so it would not look like you are instantly accusing them. As a substitute, make it clear that is your feeling. For instance, “I really feel like I am the one one giving on this relationship.”

This fashion, you’ve got politely known as their consideration to a perceived downside. It is even attainable they do not perceive the influence of their behaviour. However by calling them to it, you’ve got helped them see a behaviour they need to work in direction of dropping.

Watch Their Response

A real pal will mirror, apologise, or not less than pay attention. But when they get defensive, dismissive, or indignant, that tells you all the pieces. It reveals that exploitation and toxicity are of their nature. Bear in mind, friendships ought to develop by way of communication, not collapse beneath accountability.

ALSO READ: How to maintain friendships when life gets busy

Conclusion 

You deserve mates who see you, worth you, and respect your boundaries. Exploitative friendships chip away at your shallowness and peace of thoughts. If it feels one-sided, it most likely is. Be daring sufficient to guard your area. Your well-being is price it.